Satan Cookies

Sweet, sour, hot and tasty. This band is evil in the most chocolaty kind of way. Songs include "Dip you in Chocolate" "Oatmeal heart" and "Snickerdoodle this, B@#%$"

Tamponstry

Tamponstry is angry, angsty and passionate, a quarter of the time. The rest of the time, expect artsy tunes that resemble folk music. The lead singer once locked herself in a dressing room for a week. Those in the audience that were patient were treated to what they called " the best show on estrogen"

Disappointsville

Sarcastic songs, mostly about breaking up. The band's first effort, Welcome to Disappoinstsville, was a concept album that chronicled every aching step in the drummer's long, drawn-out break up with his high school girlfriend while the fourth album Population: Four Pissed-Off Guys covered more diverse territory, including separation, divorce, restricted visitation rights, and unemployment.

Crack Sloth

This one was a real band--for about fifteen minutes. My friends formed it in a high school, back in the stone age. I don't think they had any musical talent, though, so the band didn't exactly go anywhere. This name was the best thing about the band, and they wanted it to live on in electronic form, so here it is. If you want to revive Crack Sloth, just let me know! They'll be thrilled.

Tepid Chukky

What can you say about a band named after a bottle of hard cider that's been left open on the windowsill for two days? They're not as flat as their namesake, and less fattening. The cymbals hit you harder, though.

The Pejoratives

There are plenty of words one might use to describe The Pejoratives, and all of them are rude, inconsiderate, and politically incorrect. The sax player can make his instrument wail all seven of Carlin's words you can't say on TV, and the lead singer has Tourette's. This is a band favored by middle age men who haven't quite forgotten their punk roots even though they're married with children.

Tweeker Muffins

Speed metal meets Martha Stewart in this group. Songs include "Sift then Measure" and Grease my Pan".

Clogmoor(e)

A recent import from Scotland, Clogmoor(e) is reminiscent of the good ol' days of punk rock. Authentic in sound and emotion. They deftly avoid any odvious musical puns and metaphors and delve into a real sound that leaves you feeling alone in the highlands.

Little Balls Upstairs

Four scrappy guys playing thrash metal like robots with bad wiring. High energy performance and unintelligible lyrics. Their second album, Big Balls Downstairs, was a huge seller in Scandinavia, but the band broke up after their lead guitarist fall off a dam. His body was never recovered.

Amorous Moose

You may think they're kidding, but they play like they're serious. From the hit single "Baby, I Love Your Rack" off their breakthrough album, Lovesick, to the non-stop energy of the concept album, Migration, the members of Amorous Moose work hard to hold their own among more anthropocentric rock bands. Recently, they made headlines with three upbeat, intense cuts all hitting the top 40 charts at the same time: "Like Green Moss," "Natural Salt Lick," and "Runnin' through the Taiga."

PhilSpore

Nobody knows what Phil is or how to identify his spore, but the band rocks. Their music runs the gamut from lovely protest a la U2 to angry slack a la Green Day. Great fun for music lovers.

Naked in a Sock

Begun as a tribute band dedicated to the Red Hot Chili Peppers, Naked in a Sock quickly discovered that it was really the thrill of being naked in public that drove their sound. As a cover band they are quite good. However, their own original songs are weak and tasteless. Of course, so are their stage shows.

Unmanity

Three androgens in miniskirts and ripped fishnets, Unmanity's atonal arrangments deconstruct modern music at the same time that their minimal costumes strip down stereotypical notions about gender. Both difficult and intriguing to watch, but mostly just difficult to listen to.

Laughing Larry and loquacious Lemmings

Raised by aging beat poets in the back of a VW camper bus, Laughing Larry writes acid pop and marijuana melodies. Fortunately for fans this band relies on music and not a message. Fun tunes and a great stage show make Larry and the Lemmings fun for the whole family. Unfortunately for fans, the latest tour has been cancelled as the tour bus is broken down in a field in the Willamette Valley.