Falconetti

Falconetti needs no introduction because he is better known for his outrageous public behavior than his performances. He is best known, of course, for personally castrating himself at the age of thirteen in order to capture an otherworldly vocal register that no male nor any female could ever reach. The procedure itself has been illegal for nearly two hundred years, but Falconetti broke the law anyway to ensure he'd have a serious chance at fame. While the effect produced is rather interesting, males attending his concerts have a tendency to cross their legs over each other, painfully contemplating what the process of emasculation must have felt like. In fact, few men can make it through an entire performance without running for the exits, since the singer's eerie ability to hit exceptionally high notes never allows anyone in the audience to forget exactly how he came upon his unique talent.

Woman, however, flock to Falconetti, impressed by his talent, and aware that engaging in a relationship with a man who lacks testicles runs no risk of being impregnated. So it is that the well-known opera singer appears at a variety of publicity functions with at least one woman, sometimes two on his arm.

Unjunktivitis

Like a tragic, inflammatory disease of the imagination, Unjunktivitis disrupts the brain, sampling world music and all but overpowering it with layered tracks of people screaming in pain. This band is popular with the sort of folks who ground up and snorted Ritalin as children and who grind up and snort Clozapine as adults.

Scrubble

Have you ever had your ears cleaned with a rusted wire toilet brush while sitting in a massage chair with disembodied hands shaving the back of your head and your public hair at the same time as Yo-yo Ma practices electric cello in the attic and a trio of sopranos sing dirges in the basement? Scrubble's kind of like that, except with feedback.